Friday, September 16, 2016

Beautiful morning



seaside cottage:
my dream view - courtesy of pinterest

While driving to work this morning, I noticed this bank of clouds that ran a horizontal line across the entire eastern horizon.  It was incredible!  I think clouds are so amazingly beautiful, and so varied in their presentation.  The sky was this soft, feathery blue and the edges of the white, puffy cloud bank was blurred like wispy cotton balls...so close I almost thought I could reach out and touch it.  So pretty!  The air was crisp and cool and the sunlight this time of year is so welcoming; not so harsh and bright like in summer.  Well, technically it's still summer, but this morning felt just like a crisp Fall morning to me!  Refreshing and clean.

I wore my boots!  They're just ankle boots, but still.  And a soft hoodie sweatshirt.  I love it...and for the first time in a long time - my heated seat!  Squeeeee!  How comforting is a warm bum and a hot cup of coffee on a brisk morning?  Delicious!  :)

We're chopping our first firewood of the season this weekend.  Our horseshoer Troy, is gifting us with some wood.  We just need to make the big pieces into smaller ones to fit into our little wood stove and load it in our truck and haul it home.  The weather is supposed to be much cooler and we're even expecting some showers, so what better time to work?  We're so grateful to him because he's probably saving us a couple hundred dollars.  Wood has gotten so very expensive and anytime we can save some money, I'm so happy about that.  He says it's a healthy cord, possibly a little more.  We are happy campers!

I haven't been able to ride Eagle since last weekend, even though the weather has been perfectly suited for it.  Just not enough daylight after I get home from work and get dinner going and chores taken care of to ride.  *sigh*  Sure wish we had an indoor riding arena with nice footing at our disposal...but I do have one nearby that I can trailer to.  Which is just what we'll be doing Tuesday evening.  Maybe, if we're not too tired from woodcutting, we might be able to squeeze in a little trail ride sometime over the next couple of days.  Hope so.

I've been thinking a lot about our little challenge we had last week while riding.  For a lack of a better description, I'll call it "refusal".  Really, I can't seem to describe it any more precise.  However...I have this "friend", acquaintance really, that insists I'm missing something of great IMPORTANCE that my horse is trying to tell me.  She wants to help me figure it out, find a better way to communicate, so my horse is understood, for my safety and his.  That it only feels like defiance, resistance, refusal, whatever you choose to call it, and I'm completely wrong.  Even though she hasn't witnessed it mind you.  But she knows the situation quite well, even has a ready made term for it - tilt-ta-whirl...she won't even tell me what she thinks it might be.  She wants me to come up so we can discuss it in person, over tea.  She wants to schedule me in between clients and enlighten me.  Oh my gosh, this gal really chaps my butt!  I've known her for many years, and it's always the same with her. She knows the situation, horse, whatever better than anyone else, and wants only to help out.  As my friend, as my horse's friend.  Trouble is, she charges $40 an hour for her services and she's kind of like a chiropractor...they want you to keep coming back for more and more "treatments" or in Mary's case, "sessions".  No thanks.

She sure knows how to get under my skin though...has me questioning my choices, my horsemanship, my assessment of the situation and insists that there's many people out there willing to help me "do more", instead of doing less - which of course, is the basis of my philosophy regarding
horsemanship in general.  Always try to get with your horse, and use the situation, doing less so the horse can step up, have your idea become his idea and so forth.   It's like planting a little seed of doubt, questioning if we did the wrong thing and was unfair and overly harsh with my horse.  Why do I let her bother me?  I only wish I knew.  My hubby tells me, "come on, this is Mary, you know how she is".  He's so right.  But still, that nagging little question remains...was I?  I guess the reason is simple enough.  I don't ever want to be unfair.  I want to always do right by my horse.  Be fair. Reasonable and just.

There are more opinions out there about horsemanship than there are grains of sand on the seashore!
I do however believe that when we communicate and share our ideas, our experiences, we all learn. If any of you have any thoughts you'd be willing to share, I would appreciate them. Above all, I'm trying to keep an open mind and continue to grow.

In my gut I know we didn't treat Eagle unfairly.  I wasn't asking him to do anything unreasonable. Just take a little ride...

I admit though.  There have been numerous times since that ride that I have asked myself - "what would Ray have said to do?", "what would Joe say?".  In my heart and soul, I actually do believe that there is a better response than how we reacted.  A better way.  A solution that wouldn't involve any force at all, a softer way to reach his mind.  Reach his feet.  I just don't know what it is.  And I need to figure it out for myself.  For us to move past this.

In my mind, when I'm riding Eags...we don't have any problems.  We're a unified team, just riding along, in unison.  Of one body and one spirit.  :)

I guess nobody ever said it was supposed to be easy...

Oh, and another reason this is such a beautiful morning for me?  My dad visited me in my dreams last night.  I don't claim to understand dreams, and especially some of the dreams my mind comes up with, but oh, what a precious gift!  It was nice waking up with a smile thinking of my dad, and just being with him, even if it was only a dream.

Blessings everyone!  I hope you enjoy this turning of the seasons as much as I do and as always, find abundant reasons to be thankful and feel joy.  Last weekend of summer - enjoy!!!

Lorie

I like it!:

16 comments:

aurora said...

I am sure you are way too busy to meet your friend...if she cared, she would be happy to help you. Free of charge. I would, if I knew how to help. All I can offer is what I've already mentioned, catching it before it happens. I've been taught (right or wrong) that our horses need to know that we've got this. They don't get to choose. Altho I've allowed Koda to choose a direction on the trail for fun, in the right circumstances, but not during a refusal. I am sure you will find a softer alternative. Maybe Eagle senses hesitation from you? Will be interesting to see how this resolves. Glad you had a beautiful morning & sweet dreams!!

aurora said...

Incase you don't see my response on my blog, I wanted to say thank you for the Allergist suggestion for our Nemo. I had no idea they existed specifically for horses. Will look into it.

Grey Horse Matters said...

Your "friend" can't possibly know how to fix the situation. My feeling is that she's not going to help you but make you doubt your own abilities and then charge you for more sessions while she builds you back up and you're "cured" with plenty of confidence to move forward. What a bunch of jumbo jumbo. You and Eagle are doing fine. There's not one time I'm sure you've mistreated him and he knows it. Sometimes they do need correction and direction. If in all these years I would have let my kids have their head or their own way they wouldn't have turned into responsible adults. I feel the same way about horses. If you don't correct them and show them the right way they will not know how to behave. I'm not suggesting anything harsh just firm and fair. Enjoy the cool weather.

T.L. Merrybard said...

Can't be sure, but you saying it was when you got to a gravel track that the trouble started, this makes me think of sore feet. I had a heavy type of mare here, she had great bare feet but hated the local gravel on some trails, so on a trail ride she would suddenly jack up if the track went downhill and got rough, and refuse to go forward. If I got off and led her till we got to a smoother track, she'd be fine then, but she was never a big fan of trail riding around here, having come from a softer, pastured country over the other side of Australia. Perhaps some barefoot boots might help him if so. Tori loved hers!

Also have you had Eags tested for EPSM/PSSM? I seem to remember that it doesn't always show up as 'tying up', but can sometimes be seen in misbehaviour or seeming lazy, and him playing up some time into a ride might link to sore muscles from exercising with this condition. I know he is a mustang, but I'd swear with his build he has some draft in him.

Just a couple of ideas for you to play with! (And don't let that lady mess with your head for her own monetary gain!)

T.L. Merrybard said...

Ps I think Andrea from Mustang Saga had a Mustang with EPSM.

Shirley said...

I hear you on wondering "what would Ray do" or in my case, what would Buck do? Or Walt, or any of the other mentors I've had. In many cases it's thinking about what they would do that helps me overcome a sticky situation. A little bravery helps too, but sadly as I get older, my fearlessness is diminishing. I guess it's a part of youth, and with age one becomes more cautious. As in remembering all the bumps, spills and downright slam dunks of the past!
Keep paying attention to the slightest hint on his part that he is going to go off on you and use that moment to change his mind. I know, easier said than done.

C-ingspots said...

But darn good advice. Thanks, I'll try.

C-ingspots said...

He was wearing his boots Tona, think he's giving me the hoof, actually. :)

C-ingspots said...

Thank you Arlyne. I agree and appreciate the support. We had rain today.

C-ingspots said...

:)

C-ingspots said...

I will try to catch it b4 it happens again. Hoping it's a phase. He has likely sensed hesitation a few times, just don't think so the last couple of times. Maybe I will improve and this will just fade away.

C-ingspots said...

Thanks Aurora

C-ingspots said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
aurora said...

Another thing that has helped me is to think (I mean really believe) we ARE going forward! He will sense that, and it helps change there mind. Visualize it in your head. Catching it before it happens comes from feeling it, once you can see it and they stop or begin to turn it's much harder to encourage forward. It's all simultaneous. No doubt Eagles refusal will subside, or at least happen a lot less. As you can see, it's happened to just about everyone (a lot to me) you are not alone. It's tough to change mindset, but it can be done. You got this!!

Linda said...

Hmmm...my knee jerk reaction is the opposite of hers. If they're not lame, you're not asking them to do anything that would endanger them, you're in a "safe" area--sometimes they need a little help through it--however you have to do that. Bottom line, you have to stay safe and you have to do WHATEVER it takes to make that happen. There are a lot of horses that end up at auction whose owners didn't have proper boundaries. IMO, it's more "humane" to err on the side of a little toughness than softness that lets a horse get away with a dangerous behavior that could hurt you, or if he was sold down the road, someone else. And I won't charge you anything for this opinion. LOL. Enjoy the sunshine!! And, do what you have to do with Eags. You know your stuff!!

C-ingspots said...

I absolutely agree with visualization, and do try to use it when riding, but sometimes I just forget and enjoy the ride. He has a very strong, dominant personality and we're still learning how each other operates.