Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Thoughts to ponder

"All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen".

Ralph Waldo Emmerson

Winter is truly getting to me and affecting my outlook on everything. And when I get like this, I tend to become somewhat of an introvert lest I scare everyone around me off. I have learned many techniques over the years to help this situation; light is good, but I have very little control over the amount of sunlight in my world. Keeping my mind active with classical music helps, studying Scripture helps, especially Psalms and the Proverbs, but anything from the Bible really. Another useful tool is banishing all negative thoughts from my mind; this is an especially difficult one for me and it's not the same as positive thinking. Research in the area of depression has shown that positive thinking does absolutely nothing for the human psyche, but ridding oneself of negative thoughts is helpful. A fine line there, but if you think about that for a minute, there's definitely a difference. Drinking lots of fluids and especially water is a good thing, exercise outside in the fresh air is a very good habit to have, especially walking. I guess walking sets up a rhythm within the body that is one of the most beneficial exercises that a person can do. And, it requires no special equipment and can be done almost anywhere. That's why it's usually my first choice in exercise. But really, anything is beneficial and better than nothing.

But, I am digressing again. My intent today was not to discuss depression, but more along the lines of a person's thoughts and how very much they affect our relationships with other people and our whole outlook in life. I can be a very judgemental person and for some reason, I tend to focus on a person's flaws instead of their attributes. I don't do this just with other people, oh quite the contrary...I am also my own worst enemy. I find it very difficult to give myself a break and treat myself with any degree of kindness. I am not a friend to myself. I have been working on this problem of mine for a very long time, and at times I'm definitely more successful than at other times. One of my areas of most concern is what I refer to as my "self talk". I would never in a million years verbally express to another person some of the things that I will commonly say to myself, or about myself. And, I tend to say some very hurtful things to the people that I love the most. Not all the time, but when I get angry, look out. I tend to let fly with my verbal onslaught and can snowball out of control rather easily. The Bible says that the tongue can be our most dangerous weapon and I know that this is true. More harm can be done with our words than with most anything else, and once spoken those words cannot be taken back. There are some things that I have said that I wish I could take back, but that will never happen. I just need to learn to control my thoughts first, and then it will become easier for me to refrain from saying things that would have been better left unsaid.

My mom used to tell me that if you can't say something nice, then you shouldn't say anything at all. Those are very wise words and I'm still trying to learn that lesson after all these years. I truly aspire to see the good in people rather than focus on their bad, and that goes for myself too. The Bible teaches us to stop pointing out the splinter in your neighbor's eye when we ourselves have a log in ours. I've oversimplified the verse, but the point is there nonetheless.

May God be patient with each one of us and bestow us with His bountiful blessings.


Donna E said...

I hear you,and have to confess to being very similar with the very critical thoughts and talk both of self and others.I'm a nurse by profession,and have to admit that my job has helped me a bit in dealing better with people on the whole.My job dictates I help my patients,not like them or be liked by them! That idea focuses my mind in a different place for me.
Smile,knowing is half the battle you know your faults and you work to be better that is great,and God is a forgiving and loving God,so he loves & forgives you,don't forget that!Cheers & peace

fernvalley01 said...

Ahh, my friend you are very eloquentand insightful in you writing and thoughts .First I bet you can't scare me ,I have seen from the first the special lady you are, but do take the time love and trust yourself. Treat yourself the way you would treat a child after all you are someones special child too! ((Hugs))

Gail said...

Never, never pray for patience! How do you gain patience? By being tested over and over again!

My sister, Bev, reminds me, the power of the word, she always says when I say something negative. It kinda like the replicator on Star Trek, say it, make it so.

I have traveled the road to depression and still traveling it. I have finally found a balance of medicine that helps. Hopefully it is not forever.

I guess I have a reason. Bev told me my life is chaotic turmoil and she does not know how I handle it...I don't either.

Mainly what I do if I'm really bad, I hide. Oh, I can put on the fakey face, but I hide when I can. Then something brings me out of it.

To thine own self be true. You are not alone and knowing that should help a little. Do something for you even if it's just a hot bubble bath.

Have you tried talking to your family and saying this is me, I'm sorry but we have to deal with this together? Sometimes they, especially men, do not have a clue what is going one.

Your writing is wonderful. You may be depressed but you can express yourself beautifully.

Lil Mama said...

Hang in there. Spring is almost here and with it comes sunshine, color and smiles.

Maria said...

The short days get to me as well, don't like being shut away, longer days are inching there way though - yeah, being outside always cures what ails me

C-ingspots said...

Thanks once again guys! Your comments always have a way of making me smile...it's nice to know that we are in this together. :)

Laughing Orca Ranch said...

I appreciate your honesty and confessions, my friend. You are not alone. I am sure that many of us feel and act in similar ways. It's something we all work on every day.

Think sunny thoughts, my friend!
You are cared about and loved!

Carolynn said...

Very thoughtful post and a good reminder for me, as well. I've become much better at distilling my thoughts and refraining from speaking trash. Every once in a while I slip, but I think the important thing is that I notice and make immediate adjustments. Great quote at the beginning.