Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Not for the squeamish

Heather took several pictures of Harley's eye yesterday during her examination.  This morning I found 2 of those in my email, but for some reason I could only get one to download to my computer.  Technological stuff is such a challenge for me...

I wanted to keep this picture for record keeping reasons and my blog is the best way for me to keep a chronological journal of everything.  My memory's just not what it used to be; honestly, not many things are.  :)  You know, the old grey mare and all that?  Anyway, if you're one of those types that cannot bear looking at photos of a squeamish nature, fair warning...don't look; if not, take a look at a very good example of what we believe to be a ruptured corneal ulcer.  Remember that knowledge is power, and if you can readily recognize what a corneal ulcer looks like, you might be able to get veterinary help immediately and hopefully prevent a rupture with  proper treatment.  I say hopefully, because sometimes against all odds, shit happens.

March 18, 2013

The greenish stuff that is visible in the corners of his eye (conjunctiva) are traces of the fluorescein dye that was used during the examination.  What I originally viewed as a "greenish bubble" was probably what eventually ruptured and now is a shallow hole in his cornea which was originally smooth and round as in a healthy eyeball.

Poor Harley is having a run of bad luck I'm afraid.  Or rather, what seems to be a habitual pattern in his life.  I always want to know; why does this crap always happen to the good horses?  I wish I knew the answer to that, so that my mind could wrap around it better, you know, have some understanding.  But I guess that's just not meant to be.  As I continue to learn in this life, some things just happen for unknown reasons and as I'm slowly learning to accept..."it is, what it is".  Life isn't always fair, best to just get used to that.  

But I digress...yesterday afternoon my husband turned Harley and Kadie out from the round pen where they'd been cooling their jets after Heather left.  Harley walked out and ran squarely into the dozing Eagle's butt.  *sigh*  This startled Eagle (I think) and he kicked Harley squarely in the chest.  Harley was freaked, spun around and Eagle kicked him squarely in the butt.  I'm not sure why he had to kick him again, but maybe it made him mad?  Not sure...anyway, Harley decided to get the hell out of Dodge, sprinting away from Eagle and ran directly into a telephone pole-sized post and hit it hard enough (with his head) that the post is now sitting at an angle.  I tried straightening the pole, but no go.  And of course, now he has a large abrasion about an inch above his left eye (yes, the bad one) and another abrasion down the bridge of his nose.  I just don't know how we're supposed to keep this horse safe.  It just breaks my heart.

Anyway, suffice it to say that our evening was generally not a good one.  I was upset, my husband was upset, I'm pretty sure Harley had a major headache and we all felt pretty disheartened about the whole mess.  My husband was ready to shoot Eagle and I just wanted to crawl away and pretend that everything was going to be alright.  We just finished up the chores, brought the horses in for the night, got them fed, doctored Harley as best as we could (he was not having much of it) and called it a night.

I appreciate everyone's kind comments and certainly all the well-wishes and prayers on Harley's behalf.  Probably more than you'd think...right now, I feel like we're in need of all the help we can get.  I'm feeling very discouraged and am starting to question our motives with everything that concerns Harley.  Are we doing right by him?  Is he living a life of quality?  I don't really know...before recent events, I would have soundly responded with a yes, but now I'm unsure.  Tough questions and tougher decisions.  I really dislike being in this position.  

On a brighter note, here's a picture I received recently from our son Justin.  This is Jenny and our grandkids.  This was taken in January, 2013 in their yard in Nez Perce, Idaho.  Cute little turds aren't they?
Winter 2012 Jenny & Grandkids
Left to right are David, Jack, Jenny and little Kaylee...love them to pieces.

Wishing warm blessings to all,
Lorie @ Cingspots


Cindy D. said...

Lets start with ((((((hug))))))
You sound like you could use a big one right now.
Poor Harley. I'm sure Eagle just thought Harley was being rude, and Harley didn't know what to do next.
Sounds like he may have to be limited in his contact with the others for now. But then I'm sure he relies on Kadie to help him find his way.
You are doing all you can to help him heal, and so in the true sense of the word you are doing right by him. Of course the hard truth is that if it doesn't heal and he loses the eye, then new decisions will have to be made. But it doesn't have to be made yet.
I don't know why it always happens to the good ones. It sure seems to go that way though, doesn't it?
Your grandkids are adorable!
I'm sorry you are going through this, we are here if you need us.

Kate said...

Poor Harley - and poor you! I expect he'll adapt to his loss of eyesight, in time. Is there a safe, smaller area he could be in, with a friendly horse to watch out for him? Blind horses can do very well if they have a guardian horse.

Red had a very bad corneal ulcer that took forever to heal and had to be debrided once - the vet called it an "indolent" ulcer. It took almost 6 months to heal - those things can be bears.

Annette Mickelson said...

You are in a very difficult place with Harley right now. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I know you will figure out what is best for him and make the right decisions; whatever they may be.
Hugs. Big hugs from me to you.

Grey Horse Matters said...

Poor guy. Not bad enough his eye is a mess but he got kicked and injured himself too. Maybe he could be left with his friend in a less crowded area? He might surprise you and heal with time. I know you are doing everything you can for him. Good luck to all of you.

Your grandchildren are adorable!

fernvalley01 said...

Glad the family pic lightened your spirits , as for Harley, I am so sorry.My mare,Sunshine who lost her sight coped very well and I had hopes of the same for Harley. Prayers for you all

Lea and her Mustangs said...

Oh Lorie, I am so sorry your have to go through all this and poor Harley. Its tough when you have to make decisions like that. I am sure Eagle was just upset too and didn't know what was going on. Harley may need to be kept in his stall for time being. I am praying - Blessings, Lea

Dunappy said...

I owned a mare who must have had something very similar to that happen to her years before I bought here. However she had lived without the sight in that eye for at least 4 years before I bought her and then for the 4 or more years after until she died of old age. My mare got along quite well without the use of the eye and we rode her and even started training her for cowboy mounted shooting events.
As difficult as it is right now, there is still hope for his future.

Anonymous said...

Their are times in life that can truly test your resolve. Knowing what is right or what cores of action to take can truly make the hart sad and the mind oh so very heavy. We as mere human beings should never be put in a position wear we must make life or death decisions. But as stewards of one of Gods greatest gifts we all at some point find ourselves in just such a spot. Pray for life with all your hart, Do all the is humanely possible to keep him safe, The lord will never give you more than you two can handle and he will let you know what cores to fallow. May the good lord smile on you Harley.

Jenn said...

Poor Harley! Not Eagle's fault...he was just being a horse, but, it is easy to get angry with him.

Some horses adjust very well to blindness...others don't. Harley sounds like he may be the type of horse that does well if given the chance. If I was in the same situation, I'd turn the blind horse out with the same, quiet, trusted horse every day in the same, unchanging paddock. Sameness is what's most important, as is a quiet turnout buddy. I wouldn't turn him out with Eagle again, and wouldn't turn him out with more than one horse at a time, if possible.

Give him some time, control his environment, and he will let you know how well he can adjust to being blind.

C-ingspots said...

Thanks so much everybody! I appreciate the kind words, prayers, encouragement and advice more than you'll ever know. We'll just take it one day at a time, as always. Always prayerfully.

allhorsestuff said...

sweet dear lorie!
Harley horse, he is doing all he can with the new situation, and the others too...being horses.
I think many above wrote, you'll have to pray and wait. I add, "Trust" to that good mixture of resolve. Let the LORD do what He will and Trust, it to him. He will show you the way and the timing will be correct for the next path to take. Please know that I am sending you prayers for
"Jehovah Shalom" to be your heart's rest.