I've been doing some thinking about time lately. I believe that time is different for different people. I don't really know how to explain that statement, but it just seems to be so. For me, I always feel like time eludes me somehow. There is never enough of it. And how very much time is like sand...in that, it slips through our fingers no matter how firmly we try to take hold of it, and grasp it in our hands. I'd like to keep it. Even if just for a tiny, little while and force it somehow, to slow down. Just a little.
Recently on tv, I along with a lot of other people watched or listened to programs about the 10 year anniversary of the 9/11/2001 tragedy. Remembering where you were, who you were with, how you felt and so on. So many emotions. So many lives lost. For me, being on the opposite coast, it was surreal. I was up getting ready for work. I remember talking to my mom on the telephone. I remember thinking...how can this be real? How could someone intentionally do something like this? And then finally as the reality sunk in, that evil knows no bounds. There were many common threads in what people remembered. But, one really struck me. And that was, that it was almost impossible to believe that it had actually been 10 years ago. 10 years? It certainly doesn't seem like that long. They were talking with children who hadn't even been alive then, children of parents who had died, and some who had never even met their mother or father. Wow...
The reality off just how quickly time slips by astounded me then, as it so often does.
I heard yesterday that a friend of mine lost her husband last Friday. He died of cancer. He had a brain tumor and had only been around 30 years old. Time wasn't very honest with him at all. I wondered that if he'd realized earlier in his life that he was only going to live for such a short time; would he have lived his life differently? Who knows...but it got me to thinking about all of us and how we go through our days doing the same things over and over. How our lives revolve around routine, and maybe in a small part, was why time seems to pass so quickly? If our lives were more varied, and we actually got to do more that we wanted to do, rather than what we had to do, if time would be more fully realized? Less taken for granted because of the mundane and the routine...I kind of think so.
Time is tricky. Time is complex. Time is so very short. There are so many things that I want to do, some that I've done and some things that I've never done yet. But, so much living that needs to be done, and so little time in which to do them. I remember that song by the Stones that says that time waits for no one, and it doesn't wait for me...
If each one of us could only realize just how valuable our time was, that it's really our most vulnerable commodity that we will ever have...would we, or could we be brave enough to use that time accordingly and give our time the respect that it deserves? And stop letting others take advantage of us by allowing them to waste our most precious gift that we'll ever have? It's something we all need to ask ourselves, or at least give some thought to.
What do you want to do? If there's something that you want to do, do it. If there's something that you need to say, you'd better say it, and if there's someone you want to be with, please don't wait. Do it.
I don't believe that time is honest, and it's certainly not fair. Time is different for different people, just like life is. But, I would like to learn to become more honest with myself and figure out what is really important to me and to my life, and start treating my time with more respect, and spending my time more wisely. Like I want and with only those people that I want to spend it with.
My cage lately feels a lot smaller than it used to.